Week 5: Working Mom Adventure
Advemtures in Office Politics
Ugh. I was always an over achiever in my former life/career. So why do I feel like such a loser or peon now? It is partly because I took a lower level job than I used to have--it was part-time and honestly was the only job I could find here in the stickburbs. There aren't an over-abundance of available jobs these days, so I took an assistant job and now I come home feeling frustrated, stepped-on and disregarded most days.
I think besides jumping at the first job that came along, I think it's the culture of the place I work. Some of the people there seem to be overly intense and uptight about the littlest things. I don't think I'm the only one who feels this way--a couple 'lifers' mentioned this to me during my first week and grumble about it quietly. There seems to be a lot of tension between departments. Despite some of the characters I've worked with before, I guess I've been lucky, that overall, the company culture has always been fairly cohesive and professional but relaxed enough to feel a sense of family. I'm just not feeling that at this new job, however. I feel like an outsider, a lowly worm.
Today, I asked my boss the HR director a question regarding some training I still needed and mentioned that A had been very busy with some projects and hadn't had time to help me, so I would just get with B who will train me instead next week. Director sent a somewhat scathing email to A&B and CC'd me, and their dept. managers saying she hoped that they could make time in their busy schedules to provide training as agreed, and joked that some day if I were as fortunate to be promoted out to another department as they had been, that I'd be responsible for training my replacement. Sheesh! It was just conversation, not a big deal, but again - everyone there is so overly dramatic...So now A is probably P.O.'d and thinking I complained on her for not training me. I just feel like no matter what I say or do, it comes out wrong, backfires on me, or people look at me like I'm an idiot when I ask a question. It's really wearing on me.
I guess every place has issues with office politics and different personalities. But I never thought a lower-level job would come with this much stress. I imagine in this economy, there are many others who have been forced to take lower-level jobs just to secure a paycheck and are facing some sort of professional culture shock as well. I read about executives working retail and clerical jobs all the time. Sad thing is I wasn't forced by financial need to work. I was driven by social/intellectual needs, and the desire to get Isaac into a daycare with a stimulating learning program with social interaction with other children. I have to keep reminding myself how well he is doing, how much he is learning and growing - and how it'll get better. It has to.....